Leaving

My time here in Tunisia has now come to an end. I am leaving in 5 days, moving out of my house in 3 and arriving back in America in 6. Talking with people, I have been getting the same question over and over: How do you feel about coming back?

For anyone that has lived overseas, they know that this question is pretty hard to answer. It's not like being asked how you feel about graduating from college or starting a new job. Moving back to America means a complete shift. When you've lived overseas in a culture that is vastly different than America there are so many changes that one goes through that it's quite hard to put it to words. And most do not even hit culture shock until at least a month after they have returned. The best I can say is that I have mixed feelings. I'll miss things, but I'm also looking forward to being back.

Here are a few feelings I've had in the last couple weeks:

-Relief: I'm ready to go home. I'm ready to see family and friends and to eat some In N Out.

-Guilt: I feel guilty leaving all my new friends and the gallery. But I felt the same when I left the States this last January. It's just the reality of living all around the world.

-Excitement: I'm really looking forward to starting my new job and living in San Francisco.

-Stress: I'm stressed with moving, being in LA for just 3 weeks and with having to deal with the whole shift back to American life and money and consumerism and not getting to speak French ever and the list goes on.

-Fear: What if I get back and realize I was supposed to be back in Tunisia? What if I hate my new job? What if I hate SF? What if I never get to use the French I've learned again?

-Lethargy: I haven't been in the mood to do any work or do anything really but read and watch movies.

Well, I'll see some of you very shortly.

Jack


Reading: Gravity's Rainbow by Thomas Pynchon
Watching: Titanic, Baby Mama, and Reservation Road; also "Jizz in my Pants" SNL Digital Short
Listening: Nada Surf, Thrice, Bon Iver, Third Eye Blind